It’s a commonly used phrase that “depression lies.” When you’re dealing with depression, or anxiety, your mind lies to you. It tells you to see things in a certain way (often the worst one). Lately I’ve been thinking about how your body lies to you, too. Or mine does anyway.
When I first started on counting calories and restricting my portions my body absolutely screamed at me. There was no way that regular sized plate of chicken and rice could sustain me. I absolutely needed some dessert afterwards.
And these days it often lies to me in the mornings. It tells me I’ll feel better if I sleep in and don’t work out. And rarely is that actually true. I’m writing this on one such a day. I accidentally turned off my alarm this morning and slept through my normal gym time. I took the extra sleep, and now feel like I actually got a couple less hours of sleep. I’ve gotten used to that kick of endorphins and the like in the morning. An extra coffee may be in my future.
Similarly when eating my body lies to me. I very rarely eat what feels like “enough” to me, and when I do it’s often way too much, calorically. We’re not even talking eating to maintenance. I understand some folks do intuitive eating, but if I tried that I’d be eating 1000 calories a meal plus 1000 in snacks and drinks. And listen, I work out, but not THAT much. Sometimes when I start eating its like my body wakes up. I had a protein bar yesterday after work and my body started screaming for another. It was chocolatey and delicious and nutritious and I needed more more more. I did have another yesterday, figuring I could work it into my day (spoiler alert - I didn’t manage that very well). But the feeling, the reaction, was interesting to me.
Part of this is about learning these things, retraining your body. Learning what you truly need and don’t need. Perhaps one day I’ll be there. But for now I have to remember my body lies to me on a regular basis. The trick is spotting the lies. I’m learning, slowly but surely.